Body Image and the Ideal Self
All around us, we are often inundated with messages about what to eat, how we should appear to others, what we should strive to be; we are told to strive to be perfect - the ideal self. But, ideal for whom? There are pictures in the media showing airbrushed people, made to look perfect in order to sell something, and if only we tried a little bit harder, ate a little bit less, worked out a little bit more, that could be us one day. We might start to look at ourselves differently, start to critique every bit of ourselves for not being perfect. Not looking like the people we often look up to. And when we do not measure up, this can create feelings of shame in ourselves. We can start to hate the way we look, leading to us changing our behaviors or giving up and not loving ourselves for who we are. Over time, this can lead to feelings of anxiety, depression, body image issues, and disordered eating or behaviors. The way we view ourselves may become warped, and we see ourselves as something other than what we truly are, in the name of becoming this ideal self.
Who Can Have Body Image Dissatisfaction?
Anyone can have body image dissatisfaction. We learn how to view ourselves based on messages from social media, but we are also influenced by the surrounding cultural views, family members, friends, school, workplaces, and many more. As children, we grow up seeing how our parents view themselves, comments they make on their own bodies, and what they tell us when we are young. We may learn from a young age what it means to eat ‘good’ versus ‘bad’ food. Do we need to ‘earn’ food? Do we need to ‘make up’ for eating something? Are we ever ‘good enough’ in our bodies? This ideal also changes over time and across cultures.
How do we address Body Image Dissatisfaction?
Everything in moderation: It is important to have a balanced diet in order to provide our body with the nutrients and energy it needs to function.Think of the saying: ‘too much of a good thing is a bad thing’. The same is true for food. Even drinking too much water can be bad for us, as it can overwhelm our kidneys and lead to water intoxication. The same goes for things like sugar, or carbohydrates, or anything else we eat.
Challenging negative thoughts and Positive affirmations: While we cannot change what other people think and say about food and eating, we can change our thoughts and self-talk. We can actively challenge negative thoughts surrounding ‘good’ versus ‘bad’ food, what it means to eat specific foods, and how that determines what type of person we are. We are not bad people for eating sweets, just like we are not good people for eating vegetables. What we eat does not define who we are. Changing how we think about ourselves, and the messages we tell ourselves, is a big step into loving and accepting ourselves for who we are. Practice actively challenging these thoughts as they come up and engage in positive affirmations.
Mindfulness activities: Allow ourselves to recognize our bodies without shame or judgement. Engage in self-reflection or mediation to become more aware of our bodies separately and in relation to the world around us. To do this, we can complete a guided meditation activity meant to aid us in becoming more aware of the different parts of our body. Reflect on what it feels like to be in our body, and what it means for us. Recognize how we feel about our body, good and bad. Focus on the parts of our body that we dislike and why - recognize how it makes us feel to have those thoughts. Then, think about what it would be like to accept our body fully, reflecting on how it feels and ways we can appreciate our body. Find ways we can appreciate our body and the things it does for us.
Giving ourselves grace: We hear and internalize messages about ourselves and our bodies from a young age - it is not something we can change over night. Changing our thought processes and body image takes unlearning everything we thought we knew. Celebrate the wins as they come. We got this!
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